February 19, 2009

Winning. . . and Facing Disappointment

Thank you all for your kind words and encouraging comments on my blogiversary post. I have the best readers! It’s neat to recall how our paths first crossed and how we’ve grown together over the last many months. I love how God's brought together so many like-minded Christian brothers and sisters. Our little corner of the blogosphere is a pretty cool place!

Now to the important news: the giveaway winner.
The winner of my blogiversary giveaway is…Susie Merchant. (Cue cheering crowds) Susie’s a non-blogging friend (you know the ones with flesh that we can actually see and touch and hug ;-) She rarely comments, but has faithfully followed my blog since the beginning. Thanks, Susie…your constant support has been a real source of encouragement.

But, since Susie’s local, I also want to share Tastykakes with someone who can’t get them anytime. So I changed the rules of the giveaway (it’s great to be the boss!) and picked a second winner to receive an assortment of Tastykakes. The winner of this yummy prize is. . . Lori. Lori’s new to my blog (and new to blogging), so I’m thrilled welcome her this way. Congratulations!

A long-time reader and a new reader. I think God orchestrated this perfectly.

Plus for you comment-shy readers, there’s a message here for you: God will bless you with baked goods and valuable prizes if you leave a comment. :-) (Really!)

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“Disappointment.”
That’s what my 13-year-old daughter said I should write about. See, she’s in the midst of it. And tonight I had to put on those thigh-high waders they issue moms of teenagers and trudge right in.

For months she’s been preparing for the play at school. She’s not a lead, but she is in several “feature” scenes. This weekend she’s scheduled to go on a youth group retreat with her friend and she’s sooooo excited. Since the play is next weekend, the timing of the retreat seemed perfect.

Turns out there’s a mandatory dress rehearsal tomorrow (Friday) until about 8:00pm. The bus for the retreat leaves at 4:00pm. The director said there would be “consequences” (i.e. exclusion from one of the performances) for the kids that left before the halfway point (about 5:30pm).

Long story short, we scrabbled together a plan for a later ride that seemed a way to accommodate everyone. But, tonight the ride fell through. I was in my daughter’s room when her friend called to tell her. As tears welled in her eyes I knew the news wasn’t good. She hung up the phone and I sat with her as she sobbed, bitterly disappointed.

She had a choice to make. Go anyway and suffer the consequences or stick to her original commitment to the play and desire to experience it fully. On paper the choice seems easy. In reality it wasn’t. When I was younger, youth group retreats were some of my favorite experiences. I know how much a weekend enmeshed in Jesus and fun and friends can do for a young teen trying to sort it all out.

In the end she chose to stay home and stick with the play she’s worked so hard preparing for. The choice isn’t the one that offers the most fun, but I think it’s the right one. I took her out for a Chik-fil-A milkshake to soften the blow. (They're a wonderful balm for the soul. Try it sometime!)

Tonight when she went to bed, we both had a peace about us knowing she made the right decision. After I tucked her in, she popped out of her room and called down, “When you write tonight, talk about when things don’t go your way, another door opens. And sometimes you learn something new.”

We all have times when things don’t go as we expected or planned, and we cry bitter tears. Sometimes we need to make the tough choice to do the right thing and other times we need to accept what is.

In the end we just have to trust that God holds it all in His hands and when a door closes, He’ll open a window.

“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper
you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”
~ (Jeremiah 29:11)

10 comments:

theresa162 said...

Congratulations to your winners. I was wondering what a TastyCake was. I am guessing they are like Lil Debbies. :)

My prayers are with your daughter. What a hard decision to make. I too loved going on retreats when I was younger! I know her pain. A milkshake always help.

She sounds as wise as her Mama!

Susie Merchant said...

Kelli, now you've forced me to comment twice in a row. Pretty soon you'll have me doing it on a regular basis.

Thank you for the prizes - can't wait to see the movie. As for the Tastykakes, my children will begrudgely give one or two to Dan.

I'm very impressed that you and Cody were able to reach peaceful resolution in one evening. It's clear that if we turn to God, he will lead us through tough decisions.

And since I'm still commenting, I loved your poem. You should talk to Doug and Darlene about their writing music to go with it. I know it's been a while since they've done it but this would be a wonderful opportuntity for all three of you to share God's word.

See you soon with those Tastykakes and the movie. Thanks again.
Love,
Susie

Carol said...

Kelli,

Congrats to your winners. How fun.

I got so choked up reading about your daughter and the decision she had to make. It brought tears to my eyes that she asked you to write about things not going your way, but God opens other doors. It gives my heart such joy that someone so young has such a heart and insight for God.

Praying for her to be an impact on the people she's around, both students and teachers.

Hugs,
Carol

Sue J. said...

My colleague in the kids music ministry is writing (with the kids leading the idea formation and dialogue generation) an original play for them to perform.

Your daughter reminds me of the lead character in the kids' play--having to make a decision and sticking to what she knows in her heart is what God wants her to do.

It's not always fun to answer the call that's been placed on you (even though this play sounds like a wonderful experience). And God's work isn't finished yet. You couldn't pull a better Scripture here, because He does have a plan in all this.

I like that she knows you write, too. CJ is constantly peering over my shoulder wondering what's to read next on Mom's blog. You'll never be short on ideas!

I know you'll all have a great weekend next weekend with the show!

Terri Tiffany said...

Oh I loved this story. What a great daughter --wise daughter--you have there. You are so blessed. Made me think about those times when my girl was a teen--she still has those choices now --abit different --but the nice part is she still asks Mom for advice--those waders still come in handy. Don't throw them out:))

Barbara said...

I was so touched to read this blog with tears of pride for dear Codi. I pray for all her decisions, the tough ones and the easy ones. And for those that may lead her down the wrong path, that she quickly listens to that still small voice which guides her. You are blessed with a wonderful family and further blessed by a God that is part of your lives.
Thank you for every blog you write, each one is truly filled with valuable insights and reflections.
Barbara

Cheryl Barker said...

Kelli, isn't it sweet affirmation when our family members start throwing in their two cents about what we should write about on our blogs? I think it shows they are proud of us. Your daughter sounds like one great little gal!

Julie Gillies said...

Oh, God bless your sweet daughter, Kelly. What a HARD place for her to be. But her choice reveals wisdom and character.

And HURRAY for you--you let her make her own decision. It's so hard as a mom when something like this happens. I know I'd have been right there with my nose in the thick of it...probably not making things much better, either! LOL

The Lord will bless your girl for honoring her commitment!

elaine @ peace for the journey said...

A wise daughter with a wise momma to guide her. Yes, to write and to live out of the pain of hard choices birthes some of the deepest revelations we'll ever know...some of the best writing too!

You're growing her well! Can you hear my "cheers" from the bench tonight...for both you and her? I hope so.

peace in your week~elaine

Gail W. said...

Kelli, your girl seems a chip off the ol' block! I am so thankful you shared this - yes, this parenting teenagers is a mine-filled journey. But God is faithful; you and your daughter will know the fruits of your obedience!