Why are you downcast, O my soul?
Why so disturbed within me?
Shouldn’t I be better at this by now?
Or at least see it coming?
But I’m not and I don’t.
Every time, I’m caught off guard
Astounded by my fragility
And the limits of my sufficiency.
My mind knows “it’s not about me,”
But the fleshy parts inside say otherwise.
How did I find myself here?
One at a time they add up
A perceived slight
An expected response that doesn’t come
A glance that speaks more than it intends.
The accuser comes at night
Always at night.
Stealing what is good and true
Delighting to lend a hand
Building a tower of condemnation
That blocks out the light.
All the while testifying
“You’ve been fooling yourself.
See, you’re a bunch of nothing!”
The dawning day brings confusion
The taunts of the enemy
Turning firm ground into shifting sand.
I reel in my weakness
Until I remember
For whom my soul thirsts.
I recall who has brought me this far
And will bring me yet again.
I turn from the lies to the truth
To find refuge and my strong tower
Against the enemy.
Hear my cry
And listen to my prayers.
Forgive me for forgetting
The source of my strength
And the name of my deliverer.
For I will yet praise you,
My Savior and my God.
Inspired by Psalm 42